Moving Forward, Moving in Together and Moving On

This week we are talking all about motion and moving forward. The concept of forward motion makes the quote “Don’t look back, you’re not going that way” ring true. So how can you move forward after a breakup? Move in together? And move on?

Moving Forward

After going through a breakup the first step is to push the movement forward.

Cheryl: “a lot of people suffer different types of breakups and we have to move forward and move on, that is the biggest challenge for people”

When faced with a breakup and a drastic alteration in lifestyle, the biggest challenge for most is to decide to move forward and to follow through with the actual act of moving on.

Maryse Matta: “Even when you’ve decided to move on, moving on is a process in itself. Moving on can be defined as accepting that a situation has changed and being open and ready to deal with new experiences”

Acceptance and openness to new experiences, environments is a prerequisite for any healing that will occur down the road. Without acceptance and openness, the healing process cannot commence and you will stay in one place, stagnated.

Lucy Shapiro: “The first part of moving on and moving forward, when you’ve made the decision to move on or your partner has made that decision for you, is to change your physical space. Because when you look around, everything is a reminder. You have to look around what you want to take with you into the future and what you want to leave behind”

Choice is key to the process of moving forward. You have the power to redefine your future and decide what energy you will bring with you. Leaving behind the negative elements, embracing the lessons learnt and filling your future with positive items, be it emotional or physical, will define your new horizons. Moreover, redefining your space when moving forward is highly personal and unique to the individual.

Cheryl: “It was important for me to reclaim my space – slowly moving things around in other areas of the house (…) I stayed in the family home and I stayed with my 3 children”

Lucy: “I needed to just move out. I just needed to remake my life”

Maryse: “The common thing is motion. Be it moving within your own space or completing moving to another space. The key word and operative word is motion: that creates the energy and transformation”

When you make the decision to move forward, you are claiming yourself and allowing for growth to occur.

Dan (Texter): “I think you have to refocus on yourself. What do I really want. Do things you want to do that you haven’t done in a long time. Work on yourself and become a better person. Prepare for the next awesome relationship because you know and love yourself more and that is the key to loving others in the right way”

When moving forward, the most important starting point is with yourself, work on being the best version of you.

Moving In Together

As we age, evolve and grow, the act of moving in with that significant other becomes a bit more complex.

Cheryl: “Moving in with somebody is not the same thing as when you’re in your 20s and you are building a home together. When you’re in your 40s and 50s or older, you’ve got two people who have a life and a lot of things that come with that life”

The more an individual grows in life, the more items one accumulates – physical and emotional. Blending two homes into one requires communication, compromise and compassion.

Lucy: “Everybody has to be willing to give something up and move together. You have to each decide what is important to you and what you have to let go. Just like emotions, you come with a physical package. You have to decide what your priorities are”

We also must be mindful of when the physical and emotional line blurs. There are times when physical items also carry emotional connotations. Deciding to let go of a physical item can serve as a tangible representation of the relinquishment of emotional baggage. Let us consider the example of an ugly lazy boy chair.

Maryse: “That ugly lazy boy chair has a lot more to it then the lazy boy chair. It actually has nothing to do with that lazy boy chair. It’s all a matter of perspective and understanding what lies beneath that”

Moving Into Somebody Else’s Space

Moving into somebody else’s space requires room to be made both physically and emotionally. However, the most important element to keep in mind is comfort. When you move into someone else’s space, the first thing above all else to consider, is how comfortable you are with that person.

Cheryl: “You’re now sharing space, not taking. You have to be really comfortable with this person. And that’s an issue onto itself”

The physical space you and your partner carve out for each other can serve as a reflection of the emotional space you’ve devoted.

Maryse: “The physical space is the consequence or manifestation of your emotional space and space of your relationship, that will be clearly reflected in your physical environment. When somebody moves into somebody else’s space, you have to make sure there is an emotional space/willingness and once that space is created on an emotional level. You cannot force the physical environment”

Before you welcome someone into your space or you transition into theirs, you must know yourself. You must have full awareness of your life path and journey. You must have a clear understanding of yourself before you take that leap to mix with someone else.

Moving On

When talking about moving on, there are significant milestones present within the process: acceptance, being the first and forgiveness being the second. We’re going to refer to the hawaiian healing practice of ho’oponopono to outline the most important elements of moving on.

Cheryl: “There is a mantra: I’m sorry, please forgive me, I love you, I thank you”. When you want and are ready to move forward, you have to start with YOU”

Moving on requires you to face a situation, reflect on what that situation is teaching you and what you can learn. Moreover, knowing yourself above all else will help guide you on your healing journey.

Maryse: “What do I stand for, what am I afraid? Digging into that you develop your resilience and acceptance”

The path to moving on and healing lies with expressing love, gratitude and acknowledgement.

Cheryl: “Acknowledgement is a big part of it. We need to acknowledge ourselves. Giving yourself acknowledgement is part of the healing process, saying I am good and I am taking care of myself”

The path to moving forward, moving in and moving on is a journey that requires self-reflection. Starting from within, know yourself, your worth, your value and you will be able to maintain forward momentum.

Facebook follower: “what the first step to moving forward?”

Cheryl: forgiveness and then that part of healing let’s you MOVE your energy and move on!

If you want dating advice do not hesitate to CALL 1-844-744-SOLO

Cheryl xo.