Cheryl Besner: Five EXTREME personalities desperate to snag ‘The One’

This past Wednesday night, I was a guest on Dr. Laurie Betito’s Passion on CJAD 800. I was participating in a panel discussion on what extremes people will go to get they guy or the girl. We heard some pretty crazy stories, even one about limb lengthening! No, not that kind of lengthening…

It was and interesting hour of conversation and enlightenment, and even Dr. Laurie herself had a couple raised-eyebrow moments. The show inspired me to come up with these five extreme personality types who are desperate to find love…too desperate!

1) The Pot Luck Ladies

You have all heard of the ambulance-chaser, a lawyers who looks for accident victims to offer their services to? Well, the pot luck woman feeds the belly and hopefully the heart of a man who is in mourning after loosing their partner (think Janice Soprano after Bobby’s wife passed away). These women show up right from the start with meatloaf, taking over the kitchen and then trying to serve up whatever the man needs to heal! Usually marriage! Like Seinfeld said: They’re there for you, then they’re just there.

2) The Damsel in Distress

The woman who will trick a man into coming over to rescue her from…something. I know one woman who, if she wanted to  make out at the end of a date but didn’t want to appear too forward, would say goodnight then play the damsel card a few minutes later. I suspect she might have a hidden stash of spiders to strategically release whenever she wanted to trap a man in her own web, sending out an SOS after the date, pleading for the man to return and save her by killing her eight-legged attacker.

3) The Wannabe

This is a person who wants to be with a certain type of individual and will go to great lengths, and sometimes financial risk, to fit in to that elite world. I am talking about the person who will go to the extreme of flying first class, buying expensive clothing and luggage, all to arrive at a destination and hobnob with the rich and famous, hoping some will be single.

4) The Pinocchio

Need I say more? This person will lie about who they are on every level to be loved. I heard of one man who would walk around with a stethoscope around his neck to impress women into thinking he was a doctor. Don’t people think beyond the tip of their noses? Eventually the truth will come out, so why lie at the beginning if you are interested in having an honest relationship?

5) The Bionic Man

This is a guy who will go to great lengths in becoming bigger, stronger and better!  There is a willingness to do a complete makeover from head-to-toe and sometimes it can really go to the extremes. This can include surgical procedures like liposuction, various kinds of implants, hair transplants and even bone-lengthening for those who think being taller will help them feel better about themselves (listen to that story in the first segment of Dr. Laurie’s show). Sadly, most of the time, these desperate measures may help them get noticed, but not necessarily change the way you feel. That needs to come from within.

 

If we want to meet someone and have a healthy, honest relationship, we need to get out there and make ourselves available to the possibility, and also encounter an individual also equally available, emotionally and otherwise. There should be no set-up or game that needs to be played, as eventually we’ll need to be present and truthful. And by we I mean you, the real authentic you.

Don’t try to be a magician, using smoke and mirrors to project the illusion of who you want to be; there  is no such thing as a magic wand, so put away your bag of tricks and be the EXTREMELY best version of you, whoever that is.

– Cheryl xo