How does a superhero find love?

How does a superhero find love?

A male subscriber wrote me this letter expressing his personal views on being single at 40.  Here’s what he thinks. 

Dear Cheryl,

We’ve all heard the quote “Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars” and as my years pass the wisdom of this expression rings truer.

Regardless of what side of the fence you sit on, the one thing that I am certain of is that men and women are just different and that each sex holds special qualities and powers.


It’s kind of like children’s superhero. Not all hold the same powers but when they team up together they become unstoppable.

I call this “superhero unstoppable love.”

So how do you find that perfect superhero partner? THAT’S the million dollar question!

After being in a relationship for 14 years, at the ripe old/young age of 40, I’m caught in this no man’s land. I’m too old to hang at the clubs with the twenty-somethings, and too young to do the charity ball dinners.

Married friends are busy with their families and often unreliable as wingmen.

However from a man’s perspective…finding love is all about finding that special connection and then providing security, shelter, and happiness.

Let’s look at my options.

1. I’ve tried the online dating thing. It could work late at night when you are watching an commercial, but my experience is that most women think you’re some weirdo hacker or some rapist trying to lure you into a dark alley.

2. In your 40’s post-divorce,  dating gets much more complicated. I finally meet a great girl. Now we have to take into consideration there are kids involved. So we can’t see each other on Tuesdays and Wednesdays and every other weekend.

3. Find a 36-year-old girl who has no kids or ex-husband and start from scratch.  Hanging out is fun but it doesn’t take 3 weeks until she starts asking “what are we doing together?”

4.  Go younger and try to avoid that biological clock thing. But my texting skills are not up to par – acronyms for communication are archaic, to say the least- “TTYL, CYRB, ALAP, and my favorite AYSOS – Are you Stupid or Something!”

So my question is: How do you find your superhero partner while lugging around a bag of kryptonite?


A Lonely Superman



Pillow Talk with Cheryl every Tuesday at 8 pm eastern time on The Sexy Lifestyle Network. 

If you have any other relationship or dating questions I am here to support you 24/7 at 844-744-SOLO (7656).




Cheryl Besner


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